I killed a bug yesterday, and I could have cried. It was more impulse than anything; I was reading a magazine and this little ant had the misfortune to be on the back cover. I saw it, gave it a swat, and when it wouldn't come off, rammed it into the dashboard. And then came the guilt. That ant didn't especially want to be on the back of PC Magazine. Ants don't live envied lives in the folds of papers. What made it worse was the realization that hitting the ant as hard as I did was probably the equivalent to a person getting hit by a car; the pain was probably within that range as well. I had to stare at its broken little body for the rest of the car ride home with that feeling riding up in my throat, and my dad's latent disapproval. His "Leave the ant alone!" came merely a second before the magazine's impact, and the ant's subsequent death at the hands of senseless John Dvorak in the blow that killed the rest of my day.
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Musme said:
I’ve never felt the guilt you did when I killed ants. They annoy me sometimes. So… I guess I find your reaction quite… umm… unique. Yeah, I think ironic is the word.
Posted on October 31, 2006 10:13 PM; Permalink
Brianne said:
My best friend is just like you with the killing bugs things. She loves animals so much. I’ve felt the way you have though, but I’ve definately sympathized with a bug or too that have gotten crushed pretty cruelly.
Posted on November 1, 2006 9:05 AM; Permalink
Ranjani said:
I hate most bugs, but it’s sort of harsh that I say that because bugs help me realize that life is fragile. They don’t ever get the most of it. Their purpose in life is to annoy me to live and that’s all they’ve got going for them. Even if I spray a ton of Raid on a cockroach, I can never sit and watch it die. 1) That’s morbid, and 2) it’s just a little painful. I mean, you’re still killing something, and it all gets to you sometime :/
Posted on November 1, 2006 5:49 PM; Permalink
Melody said:
It’s almost like an reflex action that every time we see an insect at home we kill it. I know what you mean though. Maybe think of it this way: if you cross the road carefully you won’t be hit by a car. If the ant popped up at the right time it wouldn’t have been killed. Hmm, don’t feel too bad about it.
Posted on November 2, 2006 4:19 PM; Permalink
Ranjani said:
I guess it’s the fact that we associate insects to dirtiness, which isn’t true of all insects. Sigh, it’s strange. I hate them but I can’t quite bear to kill them.
Posted on November 3, 2006 9:50 AM; Permalink
Ivy said:
You think killing an ant is guilt? Seriously, why would you want to feel guilty for such an insect? Talking about killing non-human beings, somebody ran over my little brother’s dog last night and it threw him into tears. It was heartbreaking but I realize that animals have no feelings. :/ That sucks to be the dog.
Posted on November 3, 2006 11:48 AM; Permalink
Melissa said:
Awww, that almost makes me feel guilty for all the times I’ve killed ants. And honestly, I’ve killed thousands of ants. Hundreds at one time probably. (Our house used to get infested with tiny little ones. So, I would spray 409 on them and they would die instantly.)
I’m a terrible person.
Posted on November 3, 2006 4:06 PM; Permalink
Ranjani said:
Of course animals have feelings. You just made my dog cry :((((((((((((((((((((((((
Posted on November 4, 2006 12:40 AM; Permalink